21

the old is gone, the new has come. the end of an era. the beginning of the end. the point of no return. "when you turn 21, all sorts of new doors open." "yes. mostly bar doors." my 21st birthday was nothing overly exciting; it was actually quite routine. went to dinner, opened presents, ate cake, bonded with friends. yes, you can add some wine and shots into that sequence, but basically, it was the same old-same old birthday bash. so what makes this one so much more significant? beside being able to legally enter bars and purchase alcohol, not a whole lot is different. i feel the same. i look the same. i act the same. so what's the big deal about getting older?

oh, i know. it's that number. it may be just a number, but it's a kind-of-a-big-deal number. even if other people don't know your real number, you still have that number stapled to your side for the next 12 months. and with that number comes all sorts of little surprises. there's a certain level of knowledge you're supposed to have, a certain amount of leading you're supposed to do, a degree of maturity that should be reached. there's a gradual change that you don't even notice happening, until 365 days from now when you're sitting in the dark, thinking of the good old days... just a year ago.

where will i be in a year? hopefully with a few prospects for a job, some more direction for my life, and more money in my bank account. at the same time, i know i'll have another year's worth of life lessons, good memories, and $40k worth of knowledge. then there will be those skills and responsibilities i've gained over the year. things like paying for bills, rent, and groceries; cooking dinner and then cleaning afterwards; running errands like going to the bank, doing laundry, and cleaning the apartment. all these little life lessons that have accumulated over the past few years will continue growing and developing.

on the one hand, i feel like my life is finally starting; i'm entering into a new phase of life, one that is full of socializing and late nights. on the other hand, i feel like i'm getting older, and am compelled to act more mature and responsible. but then, i don't feel older, i don't look older, so am i really older? in my bubble of school and friends, it's so easy to feel like i'm still that little awkward girl with braces and bad haircuts. but then when i look around, i realize that everything around me is changing. i see all the new freshmen i've met, and all the students that are no longer at cornell; i realize i've joined that pool of upper-classmen. when did this happen? when did we get so old?

looking back over the past year, i realize it has been one of the best years of my life. i travelled to puerto rico with two very awesome girls, i went to china to discover my "roots", i lived and worked in the best city in the world, and i spent 4 months experiencing another language and culture in ecuador. i went through more in this past year than some do in 4. i also learned more about myself and the world around me than i ever did sitting in the library. for the first time, i feel like i have truly lived. and now, it just blows my mind to think of all that lies ahead of me. what will this next year bring? what new journeys will i take, and what new things will i experience? all i know is this: in the end, when i'm old and grey, rocking in my chair thinking about the time that passed, i want to know that i have learned, loved, and most of all, lived. maybe getting older won't be so bad after all.

40 days

the past wednesday, ash wednesday, marked the beginning of a period known as lent. lent is the period of time (considered to be 40 days, when in reality it's 46, but they don't count sundays... wikipedia it) leading up to Easter sunday. lent has come a long way from its origin, but current customs include fasting from certain foods or giving up something that is enjoyed. every year around this time i find myself contemplating what it is that i'm willing to give up. one year back in high school, i decided to give up shopping for myself. i know, big deal. however, what i didn't account for was the fact that i would be visiting the mall of america before the end of lent. yes, that's right, i went to the mall of america... for spring break. yes, my parents love me that much. anyway, back to the point. i was going to THE mall of america, how could i not shop? so as you may have guessed, i quickly abandoned that decision, and ended up not giving up anything. as a matter of fact, i have never successfully given up anything for the entire period of lent. ever.

this morning (the day doesn't end until i sleep), i was walking to class with my dear friend. in order to keep her as my friend, i am obliged to keep her anonymous. so we're walking to class, talking about our exciting lives, and then begin discussing lent. she's a good little Catholic girl, so she always gives something up, and actually follows through. last year she gave up coffee. both the world and i would be much more miserable if i gave up coffee. while discussing possible things to abstain from, such as snacking, shopping, and boys (basically, my life), i thought, what makes lent so different from new year's resolutions? they always create that false feeling of hope for betterment or self-improvement. they always sound good at first and look good on paper. they're really not that different.

so why is it that so many more people seem inclined to observe lent and succeed in their self-deprivation, while millions constantly fail at their new year's resolutions? my theory: it's all in the timing. new year's resolutions seem more definite. i will not drink coffee for the rest of this year. whoa, yeah right. i will not drink coffee for the next 40 (+6) days. okay, that's doable. so that's the trick. break it down a little. take it slow. treat every month like it's lent. give up something new every 40 days. stop looking at the year as a single unit; start seeing it as 12 entities. think of the year as a pie, and each month is a slice of that pie. who cares about the rest of the pie, all that matters is the slice sitting in front of you. the rest of the pie is all the goodness you'll get to enjoy after you finish this piece. so go ahead, dig into your slice. strive for that goal. make those resolutions. after all, it's as easy as pie.

*as a side note, i am currently taking suggestions for lent. go ahead, throw them out there. after all, they can't be more ridiculous than giving up statler salads. as a bonus, you'll get to read all about it.

tell me about a time...

interviews. one of the more necessary evils in this world. let me start by saying, i hate them. i don't care if it's a formal interview with the suits, business cards and resumes, an informal meeting at the local coffeeshop, or even an over the telephone and miles apart conversation. i just don't like them. now, i'm not saying this because i'm bad at them (which may be true), but in fact, i don't like interviews for many reasons. and so, i now present to you, my hit list of interview pet peeves:

first up, behavioral questions. okay, i understand that past behaviors and choices are often predictive of future behaviors and choices, but isn't there a better way of learning how i'll react to a policy change or miscommunication? let's be real here, i have plenty of hotel experience that has provided me with enough knowledge to be comfortable in various situations. however, just because i can't think of a time when i had to bend or break a rule for guest, doesn't mean i won't rise to the situation and meet or exceed your expectations. seriously, what are the chances that i have experienced every situation you're going to ask me about? are you trying to get me to lie? is it going to count against me if i've never had to work with a culture or language barrier?

next, that quagmire question "do you have any questions for me?" this bomb is dropped towards the second half of the interview, after i have been grilled about my past. now it's my turn to do the questioning. i have learned through the years of some questions that are pretty safe for any type of interview; describe the culture, how did you decide this was the right company for you, what are you favorite aspect of working for Q Company, etc. and, i do try to be genuinely interested in the answer, but there are times when i can't think of any questions that i'd care about the answer. most likely, i am too busy thinking about that one time i used technology to independently implement a solution to even properly form a cohesive, interesting, and thoughtful question. maybe i am just so infatuated with your company that i don't need to know anything more. c'mon now, hire me already!

finally, that very awkward moment after i've given my outstanding behavioral examples (and earned that gold star, thank you very much) and after the interviewer listed the top 15 reasons why Q Company is the best. what is the proper way to end an interview? do you lead in with something like "well, i don't want to take up any more of your time..." (of course, then you have an additional awkward situation if you're the last interviewee) or should it be more bluntly stated as "okay, well, that's all for now. thanks! bye!" there must be some happy medium that comes between prematurely jumping ship and lingering so long the interviewer literally pushes you out the door.

despite my utter disgust for interviews, i've had my fair share of them so far this year. they've ranged from formal, suit-up and shower to the informal, pj and coffee phone interviews. and i have grinned and beared my way through the tiring process. but in the end, after all hypothetical situations are mentioned and awkward silences broken, if you ask me how it went, i'll always give you the same answer. it was okay.

question one.

if you had neither eaten nor slept for 48 hours, which would you rather do: sleep and be hungry or eat and be tired?

the first one

and this begins my collection of questions, ramblings, and thoughts from late at night, early in the morning, or anytime in between. enjoy.